Happy Teachers' Day!

yeah.. as above

Management Courses

Enlightening 2-Minute Management Course

Lesson One
An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing.
A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing?"
The eagle answered: "Sure, why not."
So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle, and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

Management Lesson One - To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.

Lesson Two
A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy."
"Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied he bull. "They're packed with nutrients."
The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.
Finally after a fourth night, he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon he was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot the
turkey out of the tree.

Management Lesson Two - Bull Shit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.

Lesson Three
A little bird was flying south for the winter.
It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground in a large field. While it was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on it. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, it began to realize how warm it was. The dung was actually thawing him out!
He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate.
Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.

Management Lesson Three -
(1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.
(2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
(3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut!

This ends your two minute management course.

The following was published in today's ST forums. It's not the contents that caught my attention.. it's the headlines... now I know why I see wayang happening everywhere.

And chao recruit... you should know why also

Wayang need no permit

I refer to Mr Glenn Mohan Jothy's letter, "queries on Seventh Month wayang" (ST, Aug 19).

Seventh Month celebrations such as wayang and getai are currently exempted under the Public Entertainment and Meetings Act (Exemptions) Order.

While there are no regulations concerning the location and proximity to residential dwellings of Seventh Month wayang and other religious/social events, exempted performances need to meet certain requirements to ensure public order and minimise nuisance. No more than two loudspeakers, positioned to face the audience, shall be used and the evnets must not end later than 10.30pm.

Organisers of such events need to obtain permission from the other authorities for the erection of tents on their premises.

Tristan Sim
Assistant Director
(Media Relations)
Singapore Police Force

Wahahha.. See how good Singapore is?

Someone sent this to me... found it pretty interesting.. haha

Singaporeans are lucky people. If you open up the newspapers in
Singapore to read , there is nothing but good news and good ideas from
the ruling government. There is daily hope that things will get better.
Once a week someone in Singapore achieve something big - like urine
power batteries. Everyone live in harmony with the government - even
opposition in Singapore is nice and quiet. The government is virtually
perfect based on what the Singapore news papers say and are always
thinking of ways to improve the lives of Singaporeans. The govt of
Singapore is always helping its people - recently to help the poor buy
flats. It looks like Singaporeans are relatively problem free and happy
- not much suffering in Singapore.

When I went on tour in the US for one month and when I read the
newspaper, I was horrified this country has so much problems. People
going on strike because they think their pay is too low. Politicians
arguing with each other on various issues. Unheard of in Singapore. The
newspapers is full of criticism of the govt - obviously the Leaders in
America are not as smart as Singapore leaders - nobody in Singapore can
find anything wrong with the PAP. The people I met in America are
generally unhappy with their lives and always talking about trying to
change it - they dream of becoming rich, becoming movie stars, becoming
singers, becoming this on that. I even met a 40 year old guy who was
attending medical school - obviously he is unhappy with his job as a
waiter. Contrast that with Singaporeans who are very happy with their
current existence many are happy with their current jobs and don't
dream much about the future.

When I was on tour, I found out America has poor public transport
system - no MRT, few public bus. Can't imagine how they get around.

Their service sector is behind us by decades, I went the hotel
restaurant to eat, the first day they were very nice to me. The second
day I went back, they were not nice. I was offended, so like very good
Singaporean I complained. They told me I did not tip them the first
day. Waliao, in America must 'tip' to get service. In Singapore, I
never have to tip!

Another day I wondered on to the streets and found a man distributing
anti-government material. I read it and it accused the US govt of
causing the suffering in 3rd world countries. Why does the US govt
allow the people to accuse it? In singapore, this person would have
been arrested. Another day, a Hispanic union group gathered in a rally
accusing employers of discrimination - how can they do that? don't they
know that busineeses if not given a free hand to do what they want will
just invest in china or india. How come their union is not working with
the employer to harmonise worker relations and persuade workers to
accept their current conditions.

One day when I was on the "free and easy" part of my tour I found a way
to take the bus around in Los Angeles. At my 3rd stop, a cyclist wanted
to take the bus, the bus driver got down the bus and help him to mount
his bicycle on a structure at the front of the bus. I was disgusted,
how can he do that, it caused delay to everyone on the bus. I'm
surprised Americans put up with that. Half way through the ride, the
bus got a bit crowded, just like Singapore people don't move to the
rear. At the bus stop people trying to get up shouted loudly at the
people in the bus to "move to the rear guys!! we can't get up!!". In
Singapore, people would have kept quiet and waited for the bus driver
to do something - if nothing is done they would have just waited for
the next bus. This shows that Americans are impatient lot - unlike
Singapore they don't trust the person in the leadership position(bus
driver) to do his job.

As I move around in America, I realise the problem of older workers
getting jobs is far worse that in Singapore. I saw very few old folks
working in America - they are mostly sitting in parks or playing with
their grand children. I guess they do that because they are unable to
find a job. In contrary, we see many old folks in Singapore working as
cleaners and at MacDonalds. We should be thankful that in Singapore
even old folks can find jobs. In America, old folks are jobless and
sitting around doing nothing. It is obvious the American government is
unable to solve the structural unemployment problem and are unable to
redesign jobs for older workers. These old folks in America must be
suffering without an income and spending so much time in the park when
they should be working.

I went to one place that was having an election for a Mayor. So much
money wasted on posters and hundreds of people wasting time campaigning
for the candidates. Why do they waste time doing that? In Singapore,
instead of having so many people choose a president, we simply have a
panel of 3 people to do it - it is cheaper and waste less energy.
Obviously America has alot to learn from Singapore.

The only place I like alot is Las Vegas. Wow the bright lights and the
wonderful casinos. Yes, I like it alot although one night at the
jackpot machine, I don't know what happened to me and I lost $500. For
some reason, I couldn't stop myself. But later when I watch the show
with the pirate ship and girls in bikini, I felt much better and forgot
my loss. Certainly I'll come back to Las Vegas. You can see that the
Singapore govt also realise that most Singaporeans will like Las Vegas,
so they are build 2 casinos in Singapore to bring Las Vegas to
Singaporeans. See, how much the PAP govt cares about you, to make sure
you're well entertained and have some excitement in your life.

You can see for yourself how lucky singapore is as a country. People
above 60 are still able to find jobs and continue working. Everyone
living in harmony happily. No time wasted on debates and protests. No
confusing concepts to deal with. After my tour in America, I'm so glad
that we have such a good government that put the smile on the faces of
Singaporeans everyday...and when I open up the newspapers, I can see
everything is fine and dandy. Our citizens are obedient and trust their
leaders.

Gangsta...

This website can translate ANY site you want into rapper langauge lolz.

Gizoogle!!!

NSmen to serve only 10 years ICT

NSmen to serve only 10 years ICT

From 1st April next year, operationally ready national servicemen will need to serve only 10 years of in-camp training, instead of the current 13 years.

NS men who have already started their in-camp training will have their term shortened to 10 years as well.

This is because the intake of full-time NS men is projected to surge over the next decade.

Also, the Singapore Armed Forces will be making greater use of technology to enhance their fighting power.

Under this new system, commanders will have more flexibility to adjust the training according to performance standards.

However, this does not affect the NS men's liability.

Under the Enlistment Act, reservists are still liable for NS call-ups until they reach the age of 40.

For officers, it's up to 50 years old.

This development follows a move by MINDEF last year to reduce full-time national service from 2-and-a-half years to 2 years.

Source: 93.8FM

All time classic

This is a damn hilarious post.
An all time favourite song of As1/Dungeon and our friends from across LT10.

Remember the Hokkien Song ji pa ban ?

This blogger really did a wonderful job providing both the lyrics and a translation.

Enjoy!

ji pa ban