Tuesday, June 28, 2005

Microsoft Helpdesk

Dunno if these are actual cases but... some ppl are really retarded =)


Customer: Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette out.
Helpdesk: Have you tried pushing the button?
Customer: Yes, sure, nothing happens, it must be really stuck.
Helpdesk: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note.
Customer: No ... wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it yet...it's still on my desk... sorry.
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Helpdesk: Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of the screen.
Customer: Is that your left or my left?
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Helpdesk: Good day. How may I help you?
Male customer: Hello... I can't print.
Helpdesk: Would you click on start for me and...
Customer: Listen pal: don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill Gates damn it!
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Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print.
Every time I try it says 'Can't find printer'.
I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says it can't find it...
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Customer: I have problems printing in red ...
Helpdesk: Do you have a colour printer?
Customer: Aaah... thank you.
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Helpdesk: What's on your monitor now ma'am?
Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me in the supermarket.
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Helpdesk: And now hit F8.
Customer: It's not working.
Helpdesk: What did you do, exactly?
Customer: I hit the F-key 8-times as you told me, but nothing's happening.
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A customer couldn't get on the Internet: -
Helpdesk: Are you sure you used the right password?
Customer: Yes I'm sure. I watched my colleague do it.
Helpdesk: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five stars.
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Helpdesk: What anti-virus program do you use?
Customer: Netscape.
Helpdesk: That's not an anti-virus program.
Customer: Oh, sorry ... Internet Explorer.
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Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed screensaver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears!
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Helpdesk: Microsoft Tech Support, may I help you?
Old woman: Good afternoon! I have waited over 4 hours for you. Can You please tell me how long it will take before you can help me?
Helpdesk: Uhh... Pardon, I don't understand your problem?
Old woman: I was working in Word and clicked the help button more than 4 hours ago.
Can you tell me when you will finally be helping me?
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